#1 It is human nature to desire attention and for many people there is no such thing as too much.
BUT! You feel shame about wanting attention because our weird individualist society taught you to.
You probably also feel bad because you're not regulated when you seek attention or you might be seeking it from people who can't or don't know how to give you what you need. You might also struggle to accept positive attention and sabotage the attention that you do get with anxious thoughts and behavior or even by pushing the person away. Self regulation, co-regulation, and accepting love are all things you can teach your nervous system. Especially with the right help. In the meantime, you can practice checking in with yourself, learning what you need to feel good, and communicating it to your closest people little by little.
You can do it, cutie!
Practice holding and nourishing yourself in the times when attention from others isn't possible.
Learn about attachment behaviors and how different people and situations might trigger anxiety or avoidance for you. No need to label yourself or your partner. Focus more on the context and how you can find balance.
Take the shame out of wanting attention. This is SO normal and the more you shame and repress the desire the leakier it will be (and that leaky energy is what can make other people nervous). And, finally, if you're a person who needs a lot of attention, bring the kind of people into your life--as many as you want--that can give it to you! Are you learning how to directly communicate your needs without being passive aggressive or dropping hints (and ultimately being resentful)? Ready to get out of our culture's cycle of codependent communication? (We all do it...) Siren & Sovereign is a self-paced video course that will shine a light on all of the conditioning you've unintentionally absorbed from society and help you detach from toxic behaviors that tend to tank relationships from the very beginning. https://www.indelicatecoaching.com/siren-and-sovereign Bonus! This course also covers embodied seduction and will help you to embrace your natural longing and desire for love and affection (turns out there's nothing wrong with being a slut for love!). Try it now!