Or rather, I misplaced it.
Have you seen the post that says, "people who cum from penetrative sex, what's it like to be God's favorite?"
That's me. God’s favorite.
It’s just never been an issue for me. Until it was.
Full. Blown. Identity. Crisis.
So what happened? It wasn't a change that came (heh) overnight. It was many years in the making.
Something I didn't mention in my last post is that in my first month of working in the Presidential Administration (the most intensely stressful job of my life), I contracted herpes.
If you know anything about herpes, you might know it lives in the nervous system. And what does stress do to the nervous system? It fries it like a dumb stupid egg.
So for the next three years, I worked a dream job, did things most people can't even imagine, I travelled the world.....and....I had non-stop outbreaks.
I had a steady partner and was not celibate, but things in my life just kept piling up: all of the stress of the job stayed with me well after it was over....the uncertainty of unemployment....grad school which is it's own kind of hell stress.
Things just got worse and I became more and more afraid of touching myself, even just casually, for fear of spreading the virus. My sex life diminished and self pleasure was largely off the table. When it DID happen it would only be externally and through layers of fabric.
So combine all the trauma, all the fear, all the stress, feeling dirty, and reprogramming my body to only cum one very particular way.
I lost it. I lost it and I didn't even know it until I tried sleeping with a new partner and found myself having to start all over again to build back to my natural orgasmic potential—which I want you to know is VERY possible.
I'm so glad we talk about the orgasm gap and normalize toys and alternate ways to get pleasure but I also HATE the narrative that maybe most women just can't cum. Incorrect. You absolutely can and I will teach you how to expand your potential.
If you want to know how, please keep an eye out for more about my Unlocking Pleasure workshop that is available now.